Yes, that's right. Legal.
I attended a session on alcohol education for year 6 and 7 students' parents at my kids' school. They had two educators from a place called Headspace which runs programs for teenagers, an emergency room doctor who also has two kids at the school, and a police officer who works specifically with people ages 10 - 25.
The educators ran through the presentation they give our students about how ethanol affects the brain, and moves from section to section causing more extreme physiological results, and which could result in death. They also talked about how parents are setting examples with their drinking habits. She specifically mentioned parents who go to bar mitzvahs and do shots around the bar while their children are present.
This was the first thing that blew my mind. I've been to a few bar mitzvahs in my day, and I really don't remember much drinking of anything except maybe wine. But I had hints that in Australia there was more of a culture of drinking at synagogue events. Kiddushim at Chabad have bottles of wine and whiskey on every table (I have no idea if this happens at Chabad in the US or not). At one recently attended bar mitzvah in a modern Orthodox synagogue, the rabbi (in his speech on the bima to the bar mitzvah boy) bemoaned the challenges the family had had in getting a good supply of scotch for the simcha, because of a hechsher mixup (apparently Sydney and Melbourne mashgiachs don't always trust one another). The rabbi also mentioned he'd come by the bar mitzvah boy's house to play a little one-on-one because regardless of who wins, the rabbi has a scotch with the dad at the end.
I haven't been invited to any nighttime bar mitzvah parties here so I've never seen this phenomenon in person. Do grown people actually do this? Do shots while their kids are around just because there's free booze, to quote the educator from last night? This is completely outside my experience. I barely remember my parents' friends drinking wine. I can't remember any of them having more than one cocktail in my presence ever.
The ER doc gave a clinical, less nuanced presentation - "alcohol is poison" ."here are five recent case studies that I saw of young people who died from drinking", "here is a story of a 41 year old single dad with advanced cirrhosis who died leaving his 13 year old parentless", "here's how many times my colleagues and I have been beaten up by drunk people in the ER."
The police officer, though, really blew my mind. He gave tips to parents who might be hosting parties to get signed releases from underage guests so you are allowed to serve them alcohol. Yes, you can legally serve kids alcohol (a parent asked the minimum age, the police officer shrugged. Apparently there isn't a minimum age, although he said the court might question the judgement of a parent who served a 13 year old.).
This isn't a ridiculous tip, because the drinking age is 18 here. It is tradition to throw birthday parties including alcohol when you turn 18, and odds are good that some of your friends won't be 18 yet at your party. This covers the parents, but the parents also have a responsibility to serve responsibly (to make sure kids don't get too drunk, to make sure no one is driving home, to make sure any known guests are not passed out and choking on vomit in their backyards, to make sure they aren't causing a nuisance on the street when they leave your house.). Fines for not serving responsibly can be over $1000 per kid. Fines for the kid can be $79. What does that pesky drinking age mean, you might ask? No buying allowed, and no drinking in pubs apparently. There are also stern warnings up in restaurants about buying for under 18s.
The topic that the police officer did not equivocate on was drugs and driving drunk. Both are illegal. Full stop. There are really severe penalties for drunk driving. Police can pull over anyone for a sobriety test any time, with or without cause. Often they set up roadblocks and pull people over en masse for tests. I've been pulled over twice - once at 10 AM on a weekday, once on my way to Neilah services for Yom Kippur. New drivers (ages 18 - 20 typically) who are on provisional licenses can have a blood alcohol level of 0. Any higher, and they get their license taken away. My nephews who are new drivers are very careful not to drink at all if they are driving.
None of this scares me too much for my immediate family at the moment, but if we're still in Australia when Isaac's in Year 12, it scares me a lot. Because of the age cutoffs for school here, and because Isaac had finished second grade when we moved here mid-school year, he's in a cohort with many kids who are 18 months older than him. He'll be invited to 18 parties when he's 16 and a half. Some of the parents last night questioned the value of alcohol education for our kids in years 6 and 7 but the message each speaker passed out was, "Talk to your kid. Make sure they are comfortable telling you about what's happening, the pressures they feel, and that they have a way to use you for an escape from situations involving alcohol or drugs." A good message.
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