Communication

Communication between Australians and Americans should be easy, no?  We all speak English, aside from those random aluminum-aluminium controversies.  But I've found communication to be difficult on many levels.


Writing:  We get emails from the kids' school regularly, and I almost always have to ask for clarification.  Examples:

1.  From the P.E. teacher:  For this activity the students will dress in the colours of a country that is competing in the Commonwealth Games. The students are responsible for choosing this country and investigating some interesting facts about it.    

First, I needed to figure out what countries were in the Commonwealth, because I'm American and Americans don't concern ourselves with the rest of the world, as a rule.  Not the school's fault, and I'm not against learning something new.  That's what Wikipedia is for, no?   But I was confused on the dress expectation.  Could kids wear something other than the uniform?   What's considered an interesting fact?  What form should these facts be in?  Poster?  Power Point?  Details people!

2.  From the registrar, after we confirmed in May that we'd like to enroll the kids, (after a half-day meeting and tour of the school in April, where we told her we'd like the kids to start in July, and another half day the kids spent in the classroom visiting):  Normally, an interested family would complete an application form and then months or years later, when the children were due to commence, I would write a letter of offer accompanied by a second, acceptance, form.

Maybe we imagined the meeting.  And the tour.  So can we enroll the kids or not?  I handed this over to Joel, who couldn't make sense of it either.  

3.  From the chess club information page:  We are gathering expressions of interest for the club to continue on Wednesday afternoons next term.  If we have enough students we will offer it again in Term 3.  Session will be conducted on:  (10 dates listed).  There will be a cost of $15 per session and students are asked to commit for the full term.   

I wasn't sure if it was $15 per individual date, or $15 for the entire season of chess.  I was confused because the letter said "Session will be conducted on . . " instead of "sessions."  Joel thought I was being dense on this one, but if you want the kids to commit for the entire term, and it's $15 per class, why not just say "Chess club will be $150 for the term"?  Too easy?  

4.  From the parent handbook on uniforms:  Listed under parts of the uniform were the school bathers (bathers is the Australian word for  bathing suit).  The school bathers are teeny tiny Speedos.  We bought them, to Isaac's extreme displeasure.  The day before the first swim session, Isaac came home saying, "all the other kids said I can wear my own swim suit."  Emailed the teacher to clarify, and yes, Isaac was right.  Why was it different in the handbook?  Well, parents usually talk to other parents and get the details . . .  Oy.

 

Social expectations:  Is it okay to call other parents for play dates?  Are they called play dates?  How long do play dates last here?  And are the play dates drop and run or do you hang out?  Are you supposed to prepare refreshments for the parents dropping off?  When I've dropped off, some parents have, some haven't.  I'm never sure quite what the expectation is when I host.  How about sleepovers?  Do Australian kids do sleepovers as early as American kids?  And how far ahead does one plan for social engagements?  The birthday party invites the kids get come anywhere from 4 - 8 weeks early.  


Getting to the freaking point:  I didn't realize before I moved here how direct Americans are when they talk to each other.   Australians take F O R E V E R to make a point.  I've been to two parent meetings at school where the introduction took 10 minutes (in a one-hour meeting) to describe what we'll be discussing or seeing.  Still waiting for a topic sentence from the Yom Kippur sermon I listened to at Chabad.

Related to this problem, I find myself interrupting people in conversations a lot.  I think they're done talking, I start talking, then realize I'm talking over them. I'm guessing they think I have no manners. The cadence of the conversations flows better with recent arrivals from Israel. Israelis, too, know how to get to the point!

How much does it cost?:  Melbourne has lots and lots of activities to do, and often you can register for them online.  The problem?  You can't get all the information, especially how much it costs, until you get to the booking screen.  

We received a flyer from school offering after-school sports.  Sports listed are yoga, basketball, futsal (indoor footy, smaller field), soccer, swimming, and gymnastics.  Only the first two have an actual day and time listed.  The others give a website.  Only one of those websites gives actual times and dates.  None of them list cost.  To get additional information, you need to give all your contact details to them via an email or an online form.  Someone will get back to you on when and where and how much.  Or not.

Housing costs are obscured, too.  Many houses are sold via auction here, which works well in the real estate bubble Melbourne is currently experiencing.  The problem?  You really don't know about how much the family wants until the auction begins.  Or until you call or email the agent, give tons of personal information, and then they'll send you an estimate.  

Not America . . . :  The honeymoon has worn off, and I know I have to adjust my expectations.  Here teachers, even at the private schools, simply don't feel the need to call you back within 24 hours.   My requests for details on what school supplies are needed are ignored, perhaps because teachers think they're giving an insane number of details and only someone stupid wouldn't understand.  But sadly, I'm that stupid, at least in this community.  I don't know what a "display folder" is, nor how many pages in one would be appropriate unless you tell me.   I wish folks would dumb it down for me, so I don't have to keep asking all the stupid questions.